Sunday, September 16, 2012
I am forced to live alone outside which I thought is a big step forward to achieve my freedom but in fact, it's not. I am still not ready yet to face all the decisions that I have to make in my life. WHY? I got no experiences, I got no supporters. I feel so restricted by myself not daring to make any decision. :(
I got no friends there during the orientation week. NONE at all. I was just sitting randomly with some people which then I have to introduce myself again and again but seems like no one have a piece of time to remember it. Seeing people come to USM with a bunch of friends make me feel sick. Where are mines? :(
I told myself that no matter what I need to smile and be confident in myself to overcome this. Who said that everyone in uni must have friends? I am used to the life to be alone so I am dare to take the challenge. Even my kakak angkat can see thru my eyes and ask me to mix with more people outside. Haiz....
I am just not that kind of social-kaki that can be friends with anyone easily. It takes times!!!! Friends is no saje saje for me! I want sincere friends with sincere souls inside them! I think God pity me as well and he gave me one everytime when i feel i am going to give up. I met one friend. A good friend? A sincere friend? I dunno yet but it seems to be. My sensor is a bit rusted. I have to polish it and make an accurate result.
I think i lost my soul somewhere near Nibong Tebal where my uni is located at. A soul that is craving for freedom and friendships. A soul that has a bold heart but scare of lonely. A soul that is waiting for someone to unlock it. Where am I? I am lost.....
Wednesday, July 4, 2012
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
终于，四月，我离开了maxis，加入了 cubic platforms，HTC 的大家庭。开心吗？其实也不很见的。刚进就得参加累人的 launching event，（希望 commission 多多，哈哈）
一个星期后，不只是幸运还是不幸运，老板又遣派我到 pikom pc fair 去。唉~
但是，在那里，我反而更开心，遇见了几位新朋友，包括 ：jack, roy, erin 等等。
其中 jack 还是和我同星座，难得。就把他当知己，哈哈！
已经 20 岁了，年纪不算小。应该找个伴吗？
Saturday, March 3, 2012
As for my current job, I don't really satisfy with it though i have all those benefits that other company seldom offer to their employees like 2 days off a week, medical fees, and all those stuff. Honestly, I don't like the people there. First of all, 3 of them smoke! I just can't bare with it. How can a salesman talk to their customer with the SUPER-AWFUL-FUCKING-SMOKING-SMELL around him? For me, I will straightaway walk away. NO EXCUSE! You smell freaking disgusting!
Second, everyone there is trying to, you know, 'rasuah' me so that i can sell my sale to them. WTF! I understand the real life is really like that but I am the one who get the sale and I am the only one who can decide whether I want to give or not to give. Please don't give me all those funny and frustrated faces when I gave it to another person. Sorry, Mr Kenny, you can treat me bad if you want but that won't make me feel sorry for not giving you any sales! XP
Just realized that I am not a salesperson. I don't really like doing sales. It's like fucking amazing that you can earn a lot but ahem, it's fucking annoying and boring too to repeat the same things to everyone out there. Don't tell me to change the way to interact with the customers. NO WAY! The thing is still the same, MAXIS HOME IS STILL MAXIS HOME! Takkan jadi Digi Home pulak! If you force me to change the way to promote this product to the customers, come on, you wan me to write it on their face so that they can really remember what MAXIS HOME is?!!!
By the way, to promote a thing that you don't like is a disastrous challenge for me. I don't like to cheat anyone and I don't like to be cheated too. Frankly, Maxis is not my cup of tea. I don't work for money at this moment, I want to work for experiences and work for happiness. I would choose a job that I really like with lower salary rather than a a job that stress me out but with high income. I don't need that at this moment! Haiz..... anyway, do think 1000000000000000000000 times before you try to walk in to this field. Doing sales is CRAZY!
Saturday, February 11, 2012
还是，我太久没有感觉到 －－－－－－－－－－－ 爱
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
没有几首歌能真正的感动我，但这是其中一首 - 大火
Friday, December 30, 2011
I wanna reset my password of myself.
I wanna make lost of the password so that i wouldn't have to access to the 2011 me again.
I wanna forget the bad memories of 2011.
I want to forget you especially.
But i know i won't....
Somehow you maybe watching or reading this, but it doesn't matter. This blog is for me to note down all my feelings.
I don't care if there are no readers of this blog.
I don't care if you go and share it out.
I don't care if you laugh at me saying that i don't have any followers.
I don't care if you don't care. Well, I CARE.
I always told myself that I should believe in me! I can get anything if i want to. But now, i believe in fate. If fate brings me here, it will bring me away one day i guess. If fate wants me to meet you and left me heartbroken, I can take it. Maybe alone.
I dun seems to be a person that will always ask for helps. No i dun like that. That's y i m independent. That's y i have to be strong. That's y i try not to need you anymore.
People dun really understand how a man like me. No, you dun! Dun pretend that you know everything. Not you and not you! If you cannot accept a thing, leave it alone, dun make yourself like you are so open minded and you can take it. No, you broke a heart again.
People nowadays are overbearing and fake. 1000 times more! "Mama, i told you i dun like this skirt! Why you still bought it for me? I hate you!" But this kiddy wore the skirt for every outings. Tolerate? Sharing? Or taking over control? This is what i can see in this small little society. You smile, I smile. You pierce me from behind and I will poke your eyes in front of everyone. No fear, no doubt. Wooppppssssss....
Physics people should have their right brain weaker. But why these things inside my mind dun wan to go away? I am sorry....
I hope by today, everything will remain the same and everything will change when i open my eyes on the new year.
To a person that still owe me a lot of things:
1. You owe me an answer for a question
2. You owe me for your comment
3. You owe me my PA book
4. You owe me ____________( for future purpose )
Start over? I believe it won't happen.